I Dreamed a Dream

 

I am a daydreamer.  The kind of daydreamer where I can lose my sense of reality when I get caught in a mini-movie that I’ve created in my mind.  Sometimes it’s a story idea, something that I play out in my head before I write it down.  Sometimes it’s a fantasy, something that I’d like to happen.  Other times it’s a “what-if”, replaying past events in my head to produce a different outcome.  Whatever the scenario, I have another life in my head that has nothing to do with my reality on earth.

That being said, I’ve never been a person who dreams a lot at night.  I have dreams, but they usually quickly fade away as I wake up – details and conversations stay out of my grasp.  Recently, though, I’ve had several of those wake-up-and-remember-every-detail kind of dreams.  To the point where days later I still can’t get them out of my head.  Things like this don’t usually get to me, but I’m sort of freaking out!  Plus, I’ve just finished reading “Mountaintop” by Robert Whitlow – Google it and at least read the synopsis if you’ve never read the book – I highly recommend it.

I do believe that God can use dreams.  Sometimes.  I think it’s a concept that’s been abused in the Christian community.  “Oh, I had a dream about you.  I think God’s trying to tell you to…”  I’ve had such words spoken to me more than once.  I’ve never taken much stock in it, most of it had little relevance to my life.

So are these dreams just from situations in my life putting my imagination into overdrive?  Perhaps.  Could they mean something more?  I don’t know, but I do know that there’s a lot of prayer going on to find out.  Usually when you can’t get something out of your mind, God’s trying to tell you something.  There are plenty of verses and situations in the Bible where God used dreams.

I guess I’ll pray and see what God has in store!

The Facts of Life

It’s been a while since I’ve written anything. I love the Christmas season, and life gets so busy. I’ve been going through a huge emotional and spiritual transition – which I’ll get to in a bit – and finally feel like things are somewhat settled in my brain.

I don’t know how many of you watch Survivor – I watched some of the early seasons, and got back into it this year – my children love it. I’ve been impressed by Lisa Whelchel’s attempt to play an honest game, it takes just as much courage to do that as it does to get sucked into the lies and manipulation that usually goes on Survivor. I read a story she did on People magazine online last week, and there was one comment that really got to me.

“I personally have much more understanding and empathy now,” says Whelchel. “You don’t know what people are facing in their lives, so it’s important to love and not judge them. That’s the whole Christian message: that we fail and forgiveness can happen. It’s a sad commentary of many Christians that we shoot our wounded. So I’ve learned how important it is to be more encouraging and understanding, no matter what people are going through.”

It’s so true about how Christians tend to shoot our wounded. We are so quick to judge others for the sin we perceive they’ve committed. I believe this is an attempt to avoid dealing with the sin in our own life. How much easier is it to shift the blame to someone who is “worse” than we are? When will we take responsibility for our own actions?

I’m not there yet, admittedly. I’d like to be. I will tell you one thing from personal experience – taking a step at getting to a place of non-judgement is liberating.

Anyone around me could tell you that I’ve had a stressful year. I don’t always deal with stress well. I tend to worry, to obsess over details I can’t control, and generally get myself worked up over things that I probably shouldn’t. In the last couple of weeks, all that tension and anxiety has made way for anticipation. It took me awhile to figure out what the feeling was, it had been so long since I’d felt it! I am so looking forward to this next season in my life and learning what God has for me there.

Love Hurts

I haven’t posted for awhile, I know, I’ve had many things on my mind.  God’s been speaking some things to me that I haven’t necessarily been able to put into cohesive thoughts.

Our church has spent the last several weeks teaching on hospitality.  What does this have to do with the picture above, you ask?  Well, let me tell you.

Jesus taught us to be hospitable.  He was friendly and welcoming to the lowest people of the day – tax collectors, children, prostitutes.  He loves them the same as He loves us – amazing, isn’t it?  We aren’t any more loved by God just because we believe in Him.  His love is unconditional.  He loves you whether you return the sentiment or not.  Unfortunately, precious few of us share that love for others that God has for all of us.  We are so busy with self that we forget there is a hurting world out there.

Coming around to the picture above….  I’ve been hurt.  We all know that the people we love the most also have the ability to hurt us the most.  It happens.  It’s life, it’s not pleasant, but as long as we are humans, that’s kind of the way it is.  (I’m not saying that’s the way it should be, though!)  Through life’s hurts, I’ve very deliberately built this stone wall around my heart, protecting what is left of it.  While this is great for keeping things from hurting so easily, it’s also limited the amount of love that can flow out of me.  So while I’m busy nursing my wounds, there is someone sitting beside me in church, standing beside me in line at the grocery store, or passing by on the street who could use just a little bit of love.  (The Beatles had it right, by the way.)

How much more do you think God feels it when we reject Him time and time again?  Oh, we can say we love God, worship in His house, say all the right things, but how are we treating those who He loves just as much as He loves you?  That grumpy cashier, the mom who had a crazy day with her kids, the coworker who always seems to push your buttons?  God loves them the same way He loves you.  So, yeah, love hurts.

How do you think this world would be if we actually loved people like God loves people?

Thanksgiving

Taking a cue from a couple of other blogs and Facebook posts, here’s my list of what I’m thankful for.  (or at least the ones I can think of right now!)  It’s Thanksgiving weekend in Canada – enjoy it wherever you are!

* My relationship with God, and His Son.  Because of what He did on the cross, my eternity is set.

* My upbringing.  I am so thankful that I was raised in a Christian home.  I was given an amazing foundation to build the rest of my life on.

* My children are truly amazing.  I’ve heard it said that you can learn something from every person you meet, and they can learn something from you.  I have learned so much from my kids – their faith is such an inspiration to me.  I love their insight, their imaginations, and their random thoughts.

* My family.  My parents, my siblings, my niece and nephews and my extended family.  We might be spread far and wide, but we’re always connected.  I look at some of the different ministries we are all a part of, and I am so proud of what God has accomplished through all of them.

* My job.  I have an amazing job, and it’s been so perfect for me.  The right mix of challenging days and routine; normal and unexpected.  

* My church.  I’ve only been there for about nine months, but I am so grateful to have the opportunity to sit under the teachings and vision of some amazing pastors.

* A great home.  It may not be huge, but it’s our house, and it’s wonderful to come home every day to a place that’s comfortable.  We may not have everything we’ve ever wanted, but God has always provided enough.

* Gifts and talents.  God keeps amazing me with things that He’s given me the ability to do – and with the dreams He’s placed in my heart.  There’s so much left for me to do!

* Friends, both old and new.  It’s so great to have people to bounce ideas off of, share your heart with, and act like a child with.  

There are so many other things that might seem trivial, but I’m still thankful!

* The colourful drives that we have now that the leaves are changing to red, yellow and orange.  Is there anything more beautiful?

* Football.  Fall and football just go together, I love sitting on the edge of my seat with my boys, cheering on our beloved Riders.

* Music.  Most kinds.  So many different types for every type of mood.  And all at the touch of a button.

* Technology. (most of the time)  It allows me to keep in touch with so many people.

* Food and cooking.  I love to cook, and I love tasting everything.  There are so many different flavours, and most of them are amazing.

* Morning coffee.  I don’t drink coffee all day, and I only have one cup a day, but there’s something about that morning coffee that just starts your day right.

This list could go on forever, but I’ll leave it at that.  

You Get What You Pray For

God answers prayer.  He answered one of mine this week.  How do I know?  Oh, I know.  Our pastor was praying for several specific things last Sunday at church, and two of them applied to me.  One is something that is an ongoing process that I’m not going to get into.  The other was for physical pain.  The pastor asked those who fit into this specific category to take a step of faith and stand to their feet.  I took the step, didn’t look around me to see who else was standing, and believed for an answer to prayer.  It wasn’t until yesterday that I realized the pain was gone, and I’d received my answer.  I know it was God – it was a very specific physical pain that I’d been dealing with for several months that I hadn’t told a single soul about.  (Including my doctor, although in hindsight I probably should have done so.)

Our life group this week got on the subject of what we pray for.  We came to the consensus, that as women, we often don’t ask for what we really need an answer to prayer for.  This is for a variety of reasons.

* Women, more so than men, feel the need to keep up with society.  We might be falling apart on the inside, but there’s no way we’re going to let people see anything but the perfectly confident woman we’re portraying on the outside.

* Women tend to be the fixers, the nurturers, the caregivers.  We provide for those around us, so we can’t possibly ask for the same things for ourselves.  We don’t need to be taken care of, we just take care of everyone else.

* Although we are very much so, we normally hate to show that we’re vulnerable.  We are mothers, daughters, grandmothers, employees, friends and mentors.  We will not show weakness.

What are we trying to prove?  That we can get by without God?  What a great example to an unbelieving world that is, don’t you think?  I want to make a bold suggestion.

Pray big.  You dream big, I know you do, I’m a woman with big dreams, too.  Why don’t you pray it?  We pray to God as though it’s a fast food drive-through and He can only answer the prayers that He has an answer for in the warming tray.  We pray for grace to get through the day.  That we’ll be patient with our children.  That we won’t be too tired to do all the things we need to do.  We’re selling God short.  Be honest – all of those prayers don’t need God.  For the most part, we can accomplish those with a bit of will power and discipline.

God is waiting for your big prayers.  I see Him in heaven, watching you pray, and waiting for you to ask for something real.  Healing.  To be debt free.  To open a door that seems glued shut.  To help you accomplish something that you can not do without Him.  PRAY BIG.  God can handle the big prayers.  Stop patronizing Him with inconsequential, barely thought out prayers.  Pray from your heart.  Pray from your dreams – God gave them to you in the first place!  There is a place for the prayers for grace, patience, strength – there are days when we truly need His help with the day-to-day.  But get the big picture in your mind.  God is waiting to answer big prayers.

You get what you pray for.